Going Back And Forth

“I’m gonna get the fire started. Impossible for you to breathe.” (cascada – pyromania)

Yep those lyrics basically describe how my anxiety has been lately.  It’s all calm then all of a sudden I’m getting a hot flash and an anxiety attack.

My mood has been fairly good though. My mind has been quick. These are good things.

So it’s definitely improving.

I’m not writing as often as I like but I’ve noticed that I’m just not motivated at all. I think it’s the weed. I shouldn’t have got more but I thought all I can do is make things better right?

Wrong. I do absolutely nothing.

The new meds have caused me to gain over 20 fucking pounds! After losing over 60 this is a real kick in the face.

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