I haven’t been in the best of moods lately as you know. Today I thought for a moment it might have actually lifted. I managed to keep busy and not dwell on sitting alone by myself for yet another day. I wasn’t ready to kill someone either.
Needless to say my mood fooled me again. About 20 minutes before my husband came home I get recklessly angry. You know where you could easily hurt someone if you didn’t concentrate completely on keeping control of your anger. This is my mania coming through. It’s a step down from depression to be perfectly honest. At least with depression I am only dangerous to me.
My stomach hurts from keeping poison words in and not letting myself hurt the people I love with the words that can escape my lips.
I would kill for a punching bag right now. Definitely an investment to make once we get into the house for now I will just develop an ulcer while I just hope no one says anything to incredibly foolish to me.
I sincerely wish I had that type of control over my mania/psychosis…
LikeLike
I hope the feeling passes soon.
LikeLike
That brand of anger is terrible to deal with. I can sympathize.Yes, a punching bag is fantastic! My husband bought me one a couple years ago. You can really wear yourself out on it. It’s a great release. Hope things get better soon.
LikeLike