crap

I Don’t Like Lobster

I’ve been asking hubby to take me to Red Lobster for several weeks now. Even though he doesn’t really like any kind of seafood he finally decided to take me today. I ordered this dish that has everything, shrimp, crab and lobster thinking hell ya this is gonna be awesome. I remembered loving lobster and I normally dig shrimp. However I hated the lobster. I thought it was ¬†fishy and gross. I did love the crap legs though, talk about a lot of fun and damn tasty.

Today started off horribly, I bawled my eyes out for about 20-30 mins and ranted and raved because of how lonely and unhappy I have been during the week when no one is around. I passed blame for my boredom and unhappiness. I yelled and sobbed. I apparently had a lot to get off my chest. It started off as just a bad mood and then hubby poked and prodded until he finally made me break down. I needed to do it. I was holding everything in and just feeling more hate-filled and resentful and it was all towards my MIL.

I love her, but I can’t paint and I am tired of living in her house and feeling like I can’t be me. It just gets to be a bit much. I got a new game tonight though and had some fun finally. Sims 4, living other peoples lives! Hubby is going to talk to her about me being able to paint in the dining room again. Hopefully it will happen cause I really feel the need to create.

Tomorrow I plan on going out and doing some photography. I’m not sure where yet, but I hope to get some lovely pictures. I’ll post anything I really like.

Right now I feel relaxed, that’s the way I am gonna try and stay. We’ll see…

Why Does The Next Day Suck

I feel like hell today. Actually physically I haven’t been feeling very good at all the last couple of weeks. Just general crap. Last night I managed to push through it and go out and by the end of the night I was feeling better. Well I felt like it at the time anyhow.

Today I feel horrible. Right back to the way it was and I find it very frustrating. I know once I lose weight I should start feeling better. Not just sitting on the couch every day will help. I’m kind of stuck in a rut. I feel like shit so I can’t do anything but if I don’t do anything I’ll feel like shit. Ugh.

I swear my blog is for whining. I’m annoyed with myself. I don’t even feel like going out and looking at the house, what’s up with that?

Maybe tomorrow will be better. maybe..