It takes all your motivation away. It leaves you feeling trapped with this horrific feeling of claustrophobia.

Now despite all this I went out for a Sunday drive. We have some really pretty areas around here and it was nice to get out of the house. It might have even helped a teeny tiny bit. Though it took me out of my comfort zone, it was likely a good thing.

Hubby says I should just do things I don’t want to do. I don’t have a feeling of not wanting to do anything. It’s more of I can’t find anything to do. Maybe he’s right who knows.

I’m avoiding sad things as much as I can because I feel like if I were to start crying it would just turn into an endless cascade of tears.

I’m considering giving up weed. Being high every day is starting to be the only way I can feel normal and it’s not keeping the depression at bay the way it used to.  I’ll think about it before I get anymore I guess.