family support

Even Family Night Isn’t Working

It’s family dinner time and I didn’t even have to cook but I am still miserable. You would think being surrounded by loved ones would pick up my mood but it hasn’t.

Next week I have to go and sign papers selling our house and go to the INS for my stuff for renewing my greencard and it’s stressing me out

I’m stressed and depressed what a joy! I’m honestly so miserable. I know it is going to stop at some point but since I don’t know when it feels unbearable.

Even my facebook posts and copies are dark and about depression. I’m finding it so hard to do anything.

Accomplishment for the day, I showered. That’s something. I mean it has to mean something. If I didn’t have an accomplishment a day I think I would just give up completely. I don’t think my husband understands how hard this cycle is being on me.

I should try to tell him.

People and Places

Being around people if very difficult for me so when I have to do so for a period of time my husband is always proud of me. the encouragement does me good.

I went to the dog park and there were other people there with dogs, which of course is one of the best ways to have a conversation because you can talk about your dogs. I managed to stay there for about 45 mins with no panic attack which trust me is a huge leap.

I can’t wait until I can start doing more normal things. I’m very fortunate to have someone who has put up with my illness all these years.