Today is the last day I will be taking the 2mg of Rexulti, tomorrow I start on the 1mg. I’ve had that almost headache feeling still but no more anxiety than normal. Nothing I can’t handle honestly. I mean I don’t really get all that anxious anymore unless I have to leave the house. Which is something I need to work on, but like I said the whole flu thing is keeping me inside and away from people for now. I really don’t want it.
In a few days I will have weed in the house again, I’m looking forward to that nice mellow buzz and am hoping it won’t change the way my antidepressants are working. I don’t have a choice of what kind to get as pickings are slim. I’m going to try and not be stoned every single day though. I think that will make a huge difference. I need to be alert to look after the puppy.
Speaking of the puppy, have I mentioned how thrilled I am that she is pad trained already. It’s been too cold outside for a little 3 pound pup. She has left some bruises on me with her teething though, thankfully she is getting less nippy.
Well that’s it for today, back to Criminal Minds.
Today I reached over 500 followers. Thank you to the people who read my blog and get something from it. That means the world to me.
The puppy is doing even better today, I got little bruises all over though from her rough playing, those little teeth are sharp and she bites and pinches. I keep giving her toys to chew on, but she likes my fingers and arms so much better it seems.
My mood today has been good. I woke up on the right side of the bed happy but a little tired. I usually sleep until noon each day because it takes me so long to fall asleep at night but the puppy had me up about 9:30am. Gotta make sure she gets her antibiotics. I did manage to nap today though, as soon as her little head starts bobbing like she is going to pass out I put her down on the floor and let her go potty on the pads then she climbs the stairs up onto the bed. Here I was talking about my mood and I started talking about Dani again. lol.
I feel hopeful today. Perhaps things will swing back around to being good for a while, I like when that happens. My shrink really has seem to found the right mixture for my depression and as I said I don’t have manic episodes anymore since I had my hysterectomy several years ago. I do miss the hypo-mania though. It allowed me to get stuff done and right now I am still overwhelmed about the amount of housework that needs to get done. I need to start off small, but it’s hard when I am making sure the little one isn’t chewing through cords and what not. Yes it’s an excuse but a valid one.
Maybe I’ll get hubby to watch her so I can get some stuff done this weekend. We’ll see.
Ok the puppy is starting to feel better in her lungs thanks to some antibiotics but now her poor tushy is giving her problem which I assume is from the antibiotics, I know it does it to people. The poor little thing we’re trying to get her over 3 pounds so she doesn’t go hypoglycemic but with all these problems it’s going to take a bit. Today she was coughing less and actually playing, she has been sleeping for the past 3 days so you can understand why that’s good.
My mood is still pretty good though I’m feeling sorry for the little fur baby. I’m nervous about seeing my shrink because of the rexulti, but I am going to deal.
I haven’t smoked any weed since Christmas day so I don’t know if that is a factor or not, we’ll see in February when I start smoking again. If it turns out to have a negative impact on my antidepressants thanI will just not smoke anymore. At least not as often. Maybe once in a blue moon. We’ll see.
My diet still hasn’t taken off, with the new puppy and the sink being full of dishes I haven’t managed to get any cooking done, so we’ve had a lot of pizza and hamburgers. The sink is a battle between my husband and myself. We’ll see who loses. lol.
Well that’s it for today, see ya tomorrow.
I almost forgot to post today. Hubby and I sat down and binge watched the entire second season of the magicians. I’m counting this as writing today because I haven’t gone to bed yet.
Today was another okay day, with hints of blah. I again didn’t sleep very well. Going to have to talk to my shrink about it, she will likely suggest tarazadone (sp?) an antidepressant that actually helps you sleep. We have had to do that in the past. Still haven’t heard back on whether the appeal has been accepted or not. I hate waiting for other people to do things that might end up being beneficial to me.
I don’t have much else to say. I’m going to go crawl into bed and hope to sleep tonight. I’m not sure I’ll be able to as I got a couple hours sleep this afternoon, but keep your fingers crossed.
Today I have been mostly just Okay with the occasional spot of happiness. I like that. I think I would feel even better if I could get some decent sleep. I keep waking up constantly through the night and then having a problem falling back asleep.
I’ve always had a hard time with sleeping. I can nap pretty well but a full nights sleep doesn’t happen all that often. I think it has to do with my meds to be honest.
Last night was really weird because I woke up to go to the washroom and accidentally knocked over something with liquid in it on the back of the toilet and didn’t realize it happened. The dogs started barking and I heard this weird sound and hubby sprang out of bed to check the doors. I figured out where it was coming from but not what it was for a couple minutes. That definitely got the adrenaline going. Took a long while to go to sleep after that.
I did put away some things today which honestly getting anything done is a bloody miracle. I am writing my blog too, so my days feel like I am accomplishing something. I’m glad I decided to do this.
Today I woke up on the almost right side of the bed. I wanted to engage in activities and didn’t nap. I had a wonderful conversation with my husband and was able to participate instead of just yeahing when he said something. Like I said a better day. I hope that my brain continues to go into that direction.
Sadly I can’t think of a thing to write about though. My brain is drawing a blank. Don’t you hate that?
I’ll write more later if something pops in my head.
I didn’t write a blog yesterday because I plain didn’t want to. I wasn’t in the mood to do a damn thing. Not much in the mood for writing today either but I hate to miss so many days so close together. Someone might actually read what I say. I dunno why, I feel like a dumb fuck. I feel terrified about going on the new antidepressant. Needless to say I’ve been all kinds of blah.