I got nothing to write.. oh I bet that makes the writers shudder. I mean I have nothing to write about.
Today I showered and cleaned the sheets and comforter for the bed so I got something accomplished.
Now I’m just stoned and watching Last Man Standing.
I have decided to give up meat. I just like animals too much. I don’t enjoy the thought of them suffering so I can eat. There are tons of things for me to eat that don’t involve something getting hurt.
Hubby is at a steak house tonight for work. I swear he waited until I made up my mind to tell me lol. the shit.
It’s been a very lonely day.
SIL went out tonight so she’s not coming by. I could have had MIL over but she deserves some time to herself. Everyone that doesn’t constantly have it, needs it.
I’m trying to lose weight. I’m trying really hard not to eat sweets but damn I want some cake. Been craving it all day. Lucky for me there is nothing within walking distance, I might have walked for it lol.
Today has been pretty uneventful.
Yesterday my sister in law invited me to a little gathering she is having Sunday, I’m actually thinking about going as it will be good practice for the fourth.
Hubby doesn’t want me drinking anymore so it might be hard though.
I ended up having a really good night. Was a lot of fun. I totally need the socialization and it’s great when it is someone I love hanging out with so much. Now if I could just do it without the drinking that would totally rock, but it’s one thing or another right now.
Today has been good, just been giving my brain a break by listening to my music stoned. It really occupies all those horrible self hatred and worry about everything moments.
having a wonderful day hanging out with my SIL, it’s wonderful and I don’t want to interrupt it so sorry this blog will be la suck for today.
Gotta grab the joy!
Just a little interaction helps improve my mood. Also my little friend came with that interaction so I am much more relaxed than I have been in days.
I’m still trying to figure out what to do about making a difference but I’ll figure it out. I think that I might just give up meat for starters. I know it would require some serious discipline but I think I can do it. I just can’t stand it anymore.
I do have a new art project I thought of that I think might turn out interesting, if I like it I’ll post a picture of it. Today I’m painting though. I’m trying to paint a flower. Not realistic or anything just something that I like. It’s going OK so far.
Wanted to do my blog before my alarm today, it always makes me go ugh even if I end up enjoying the writing.
I’m tired of things being the way they are. I read stories all day about people and animals that need help or have been helped and I want to be one of those people that do that. I have no idea where to start since going out isn’t really something I am good at yet. It’s eating me up though. I just have such a strong yearning to help.
I would gladly take suggestions for things I can do from my home. Anyone have any idea’s?
I have the most wonderful husband. We’ve been together for over 15 years. He is gentle and kind and supportive. I get many hugs from him every single day. (unless he travels)I’m super fortunate to have such a good man. Even when I am depressed and on the edge of wanting to kill myself he can still manage to pull laughter from me.He’s a giant teddy bear. He’s what keeps me going. I just wanted to say how much I love him and like him. He’s my best friend and he puts up with my shit.
Today he found a dying baby bird in the parking lot at work and instead of walking by it like everyone else was he got a paper towel so he could put the poor little thing back in the nest. He is such a good tender hearted person. I’m not sure what I did to deserve him but I am never letting him go.
I think I’ll go get a hug now.
I’m in such a bad mood and I’m angry. I have no idea why, well other than my dealer sucks right now..
Supposed to be family night but mom in law is watching the niece and sis in law hasn’t shown or answered my text. Nothing is going right today.
I could punch someone.. Actually I am going to go and punch the shit out of my punching bag. later…
I woke up in a bad mood today. I literally barked at my dog when she wouldn’t stop barking and scared her. I was so pissed though. Construction going on since first thing in the morning, making the dogs bark, keeping me awake. There’s a reason I sleep until 11 or 12, it’s so I don’t have to fill 8 hours of being alone.
So ya I’m bitchy!
My alarm went off to write the blog in the middle of hubby and me watching some TV we have DVR’d. After the episode is over hubby shuts off the TV and I’m like what the fuck dude. He’s like go write your blog then we can watch some more. So here I am writing my blog. Even though I yelled and stamped my feet like a child walking up the stairs to my computer, I’m here. Well I was here.. Now I’m gone, til tomorrow anyhow.
A Bipolars Reality 