Fourth of July

More Fourth of July

Here is a movie of some of the fireworks. I just don’t feel like posting 😦

Dang Life

Missed posting yesterday I think. I went over to the MiL’s way earlier than planned and then stayed later.

I survived 3 days of being surrounded by people for hours. I’m still glad it’s over though. I never really felt comfortable any where. I spent a lot of my time on the front porch by myself getting stoned. It really helped me get through it. It may totally fuck up my depression but it helps with the anxiety. Wish I didn’t have to quit it eventually, but I know I do.

Not Like I Used To

I used to be able to drink and party and wake up the next day and start all over again. I definitely don’t have that ability anymore. I had three beers yesterday morning(ish) and felt like hell the rest of the day and I feel like crap today. I can’t keep up with SIL, course she is more then 10 years my junior I believe.

I’m waking up stressed about the fourth of July. I hate the gathering the socializing. I do love the fire works. Wish I could just stay home with hubby and watch him light fireworks off. Last year I had no problem, which goes to show you just how much you can backslide in a year. I have no idea how to fix this.. ugh,


Weird Way

Today started off on a weird start. SIL stopped by and got me out of bed, then we proceeded to have a few beers. I don’t think I felt straight for longer than 10 mins this morning. I feel super weird now.

I’m just listening to music and smoking weed by myself now. Just kind of relaxing before next week when the father in law and a bunch of family come to town for the fourth of July.  I’m super stressed about it unless I am listening to music than I’m not thinking about it.

I’m in a pretty good mood over all, it’s a nice change.

Interaction always helps with my mood.


Happy Fourth

These were some of the fireworks tonight

Super Sick, Super Happy

My flu has gotten worse of all damn things, I’m giving up the lithium until this thing is gone. Haven’t had a bug like this in years. It’s causing me a lot of problems without having to worry about driing a ton of water then peeing constantly so I can sleep/rest to get well. I just feel that bad.

in good news though we found out we get to move to Omaha at the end of June so we will be back in time for dah dah dah…. Fourth of July! The gathering of people we know combined with good food and fireworks!!! Yayyyyyyy

Can you tell I’m excited? As soon as hubby told me I ordered boxes and bubble wrap and started gathering things very slowly.. Basically I got two loads of laundry done then fell asleep watching Frozen cause it exhausted the hell out of me, but I am thrilled.

I’m sure mom in law will be even more thrilled. When she read the card she literally screamed. Wish I had thought to record that. Anyhow that was my days, toodles